How I Art Greatly (How to Be an Amazing Writer)
Uncategorized / April 15, 2015

Okay, I don’t art greatly. I don’t even art modestly. But I  am a pretty amazing writer. I tend to watch people a lot. For one thing, it’s funny and I like the free entertainment. For another, it gives me more things to write about. I’ve noticed lately, though, that people aren’t very kind to themselves about writing. I want to write, but I always write garbage. I thought I wrote something wonderful, but my readers told me I should keep my day job. I get tempted to go explain the problem to them, but I have nineteen restraining orders in place, so I thought I’d just tell you all here: Everyone starts out writing garbage.  The good writers keep writing anyway. I know, you see my writing and wonder how I got to be an amazing writer in such a short period of time. I’m a Figment! I was created with twenty years of writing experience in my backstory.  You’re human (I could be wrong), so you have to do things the hard way. You have to write words, words, and more words until you get twenty years under your belt the old-fashioned way. Of course, even literary geniuses…