Eleventh Hour- Part Seven

It’s the penultimate part to the short story I’m doing on Wattpad. I think the site keeps leaving off zeroes, so I’m up to nearly 300 reads (or less than 30, if you want to believe that could possibly be accurate). I’ll have to think of something new when this passes… or maybe post a chapter or two of Veneri Verbum to whet a few appetites.

My Social Reality Manager, Chelo, will be taking over the posting after the short is finished. I hope you’ll all be as wonderful to her as you’ve been to me.  Okay, wonderfuller. She could quit on me.

Eleventh Hour- Part Five

There is obviously a glitch with the Wattpad system, as it only shows sixteen views and I know all my devoted fans are hanging on my every word with my new short story, “Eleventh Hour”. Keep reading! I’m sure Wattpad will fix the issue soon and I’ll be able to thank each and every one of you at an award’s show somewhere.

Eleventh Hour- Part Three

Part three is now available on Wattpad.

If you’re not following, I hope it wasn’t to watch the woman do a marathon with red paint in her pants. That was just awkward. How does she get the paint off? Do other runners mind running in the paint? Who puts paint in their pants in the first place and why is it news?

Yeah, I thought you’d rather read my story.

How I Art Greatly (How to Be an Amazing Writer)

Okay, I don’t art greatly. I don’t even art modestly. But I  am a pretty amazing writer.

I tend to watch people a lot. For one thing, it’s funny and I like the free entertainment. For another, it gives me more things to write about. I’ve noticed lately, though, that people aren’t very kind to themselves about writing.

I want to write, but I always write garbage.

I thought I wrote something wonderful, but my readers told me I should keep my day job.

I get tempted to go explain the problem to them, but I have nineteen restraining orders in place, so I thought I’d just tell you all here: Everyone starts out writing garbage.  The good writers keep writing anyway.

I know, you see my writing and wonder how I got to be an amazing writer in such a short period of time. I’m a Figment! I was created with twenty years of writing experience in my backstory.  You’re human (I could be wrong), so you have to do things the hard way. You have to write words, words, and more words until you get twenty years under your belt the old-fashioned way.

Of course, even literary geniuses like myself have another secret up our sleeves: we edit.  Yep, there it is, free for the taking.  I can crank out a book in about thirty days, but I still need at least another thirty days (I did mention literary genius, right?) before it becomes a masterpiece. That’s with twenty years of experience. You may need three months to write your book and another year to edit it.  You may even write a few things that you can’t salvage. That’s okay.  Write anyway.

In fact, even if you normally think of yourself as just being a reader, go write something today.  Turn off the pretty moving pictures, close the book you were reading (unless it’s mine), and write something. Don’t know where to start? Here’s a little nudge:

The sun fell into the ocean.

Yes, I’m gifting you with a magical sentence you may use to write any genre, even icky touchy-feely chick lit.  Leave me a comment in the comments section with your masterpiece. Or don’t. But write anyway.

If you don’t, you may put a tear in the space-time-space continuum, and you know what happens after that.